Motherhood...and beyond

Hi everyone, it's Aileen. Since Marek's arrival everyone keeps asking me " how does it feed to be a mom?" at first, I had a hard time answering this. To be honest, it felt like a really long babysitting job. Part of me still didn't believe he was mine! Although this was obvious to everyone else, it took some time for it to sink in. I think this was partly because all I could think about was feedings, diaper changes, and occasionally wondering when I had last eaten. So now we are two months in, and how does it feel to be a mom? I would sum it up with two words; awesome and humbling. Marek will smile a coo at me, as if to say, " you are my mom, and I love you". It is a pretty great feeling. Knowing that right now I am the most important person in his life is amazing. This isnt me boasting, it is a matter of fact as I am literally sustaining his life through breast feeding. I will admit that although I have taken care of kids for over ten years now, everything I knew flew out the window when Marek was born. Maybe it was the hormones, or maybe it was the pressure of wanting to do everything right,but I had moments of fear, when despite all my knowledge and reading of parenting books, I was convinced I was doing something wrong. I cried whenever he cried or spit up. Silly, after all that is what babies do! I found myself walking into his room to make sure he was breathing, even though I swore I would never do that. I have relaxed since our first weeks together; babies will do that for you. They force you to stop, relax, and just roll with the punches. I think it's a lesson babies teach us early on, so to prepare us for the future. I know that Marek and I have only just started this journey together, but he has already taught me so much. He has made me a better, happier person (don't let the bags under my eyes fool you! I may be tired, but happy). there is so much I cannot control ( like spit up-despite trying every trick in the book!)One thing I am glad I can't control, my unconditional love for Marek. That I wouldn't trade for the world.

Figuring it all out

That's what I've been trying to do lately.  There is so much in this world that I have no idea about!  Mom and Dad say they have a lot to figure out too.  (Aren't the adults suppose to know what they are doing??)  We took our first family getaway to Albany for a family get- together.  That was an adventure.  Mommy nearly packed up the entire apartment, she says we like to be comfortable when we travel.  Dad said I better not take after her in that department.  We packed up the jeep and went for a long ride, but I slept most of the way there and back.  I stayed in a hotel and got to meet lots of family members, including my Great Grandma and Great Grandpa (My middle name, James, is after Great Grandpa!)   I think Mom and Dad did a good job that weekend, although we were tired.  That weekend I slept from 8:30pm-4am two nights in a row!  Speaking of sleeping, that's another thing I'm figuring out.  Mom keeps telling me I have to start "doing my nights"; it's a French thing.  She says it's up to me to start sleeping through the night. The other morning Mom came to get me at 5am. She kept saying she was so proud of me for sleeping through the night. I just laughed because she didn't know that Dad had snuck in at 2am to feed me! Most nights I do pretty well.  I only get up once during the night, 2am on the dot!  I try to go back to sleep until 5:30-6, since that is when Mom and I will get up to go to daycare.  Speaking of daycare, we ventured out last week and visited everyone at The Creative Play Learning Center.  Soon I get to go to work with Mommy!  I visited with "Gramma" Sandi and met my teacher, Ms. Patti!  Mom says I'm going to have lots of fun there, but I will have to learn to wait my turn sometimes.  She says introducing a little frustration will make me into a well-rounded person.  I don't know...sounds like another French thing.

I'm also discovering how things work and what is around me.  I now know that if I kick at the toys hanging from my playmat they make noise!  I love looking at curtains and ceiling fans.  I get really excited when Dad comes home from work and will smile and giggle.  Mom and Dad are doing a good job of figuring me out too. Trust me, I can be a handful!  Although they haven't quite figured out how to stop me from spitting up or pooping through my diaper.  Any thoughts??